Putting kids before money post-divorce

For many people, money equals security. This is especially often true of individuals who have children. It makes sense, therefore, that money, and lack thereof, continues to be a major point of contention between many divorced parents. When it comes to co-parenting, sorting out finances and financial responsibilities can be difficult. It's important, however, that, for the sake of a shared child, both parents pledge to work towards finding resolutions that are mutually beneficial.

Post-divorce, parents are left on their own to figure out and survive in their new financial situation. As a result, a divorced mom or dad may need to make due without certain luxuries that could previously be afforded on two salaries. As both parents attempt to succeed in their post-divorce worlds, matters related to a shared child should remain at the forefront.

While divorced parents attempt to do their best and provide for a child, concerns related to finances and how to split financial obligations related to child-rearing must be sorted out. Frequently, child-centered financial disputes erupt due to unequal child custody terms. For example, a father who lost primary child custody and pays child support may resent an ex-wife and make disparaging comments related to his ex's financial decisions.

While disputes over money problems during a marriage may have contributed to a marriage's demise, those that continue post-divorce and relate to child custody matters serve to harm a child. Divorced parents, therefore would be wise not to discuss financial disputes in front of a child. Parents should also realize that an ex-spouse's financial struggles ultimately harm a shared child and should therefore do their best not to contribute to an ex-spouse's financial woes.

Source: The Huffington Post, "The Money After Divorce Manifesto: A Neverending Story," John McElhenney, July 11, 2014