Secrets to a 'good divorce'

When Maryland couples decide to get divorced, what used to be calm conversations may turn into relatively heated discussions. Both parties could potentially leave the conversation angry, frustrated and maybe even ready to pull out their hair. However, it is helpful if during a divorce neither spouse allows themselves to get this way, when possible. Instead of treating the divorce process as a personal problem, treat it as if it is one of the biggest business decisions of your life. Check your emotions at the door just as you would if you were attending a business meeting.

During the divorce process, there are likely to be situations and topics that arise where one spouse doesn't feel the same as the other. For example, it could include how the assets are divided or the financial well-being of each respective spouse. One spouse may feel as though the settlement that the other spouse is offering isn't in their best interest. And that's okay not to commit to something being offered to you and its okay to say something if you don't like it. Through collaborative law former spouses can work to reach a mutually-beneficial agreement.

The most important thing in this type of situation is not to let emotions overcome you, as difficult as this may feel. Simply tell the other spouse that you don't feel comfortable with what he or she is offering and provide a counter offer. Work together to make decisions in the divorce so that each of you get what you feel is fair and equitable.

While there are likely plenty of reasons to argue during a divorce, the fact of the matter is that it doesn't get you very far. Instead of arguing with an ex-spouse, try to work things out through mediation. Mediation, which is often used in Maryland, can greatly enhance a divorce settlement by providing a more amicable process for both parties.

Source: Huffington Post, "The Art Of Not Arguing," Debbi Dickinson, May 7, 2012