Grief and loss common emotions in a divorce
Anyone that’s married knows it can be difficult to sustain a close relationship with a significant other. Indeed, all marriages go through many ups and downs. Arguments or differing opinions related to finances, infidelity, substance abuse, children and life goals are all challenges that many married couples must fight to resolve and overcome.
In some cases, how each spouse attempts to communicate about or cope with some of the divisive issues listed above serves to compound problems and ultimately leads a couple to make the decision to divorce. However, even in cases where both spouses know a marriage is beyond salvaging, it’s likely both will, at some time, experience intense feelings of loss, regret and loneliness.
Much like the death of a loved one, the demise of a marriage is a great loss. It’s normal and healthy, therefore, to grieve that loss. This is true even in cases where a marriage may never have been happy or healthy as the hope that a spouse may change and a marriage will be happy is forever lost.
For ex’s who have children together, it can be especially difficult to cope with these intense feelings and emotions. For individuals who are especially struggling, it’s important to seek support and help. In cases where an individual is not able to turn to family members or friends, it’s wise to seek the advice of a professional therapist or counselor.
In the wake of a divorce, many individuals struggle. As part of the grieving process, it’s important that all divorcees take the time to acknowledge and recognize their own faults and how each contributed to the death of a marriage. It’s also important that an individual is able to recognize that things will get better and that he or she will once again find love and happiness.
Source: The Huffington Post, ” Positive Divorce: From Blame to Forgiveness,” John McElhenney, May 20, 2014